Saint Paul’s conversion is a favorite feast day for many people, as well as a favorite subject for artists. It is, however, misunderstood by many and far from typical because it was a conversion in belief as opposed to a conversion of behavior or conduct.
Domenico Morelli’s “The Conversion of St. Paul” (1876)
In his epistle to the Galatians, we hear St. Paul talk about this transformation. He explains how he went from being a zealous practitioner of Pharisaic Judaism to becoming a staunch believer in Christ. He went full circle, from persecuting Christians to being persecuted, even being martyred:
For you heard of my former way of life in Judaism, how I persecuted the Church of God beyond measure and tried to destroy it, and progressed in Judaism beyond many of my contemporaries among my race, since I was even more a zealot for my ancestral traditions. But when God, Who from my mother’s womb had set me apart and called me through His grace, was pleased to reveal His Son to me, so that I might proclaim Him to the gentiles, I did not immediately consult flesh and blood, nor did I go up to Jerusalem to those who were apostles before me; rather, I went into Arabia and then returned to Damascus. Then, after three years, I went up to Jerusalem to confer with Peter and remained with him for fifteen days. (Galatians 1:11-18)
He was not a man who woke up one morning from a dream and decided to put an irreligious life of sin and debauchery behind him. Paul, from his youth, was a devout Jew who practiced his faith religiously and, as far as he was concerned, lived an exemplary life up to his conversion.
Paul’s conversion was about coming to a deeper understanding of who God was and that Jesus was God. It was the start of the total transformation of his mind and his religious beliefs. All of us know people who are so confident in themselves that they never once question the validity of their beliefs. Paul was one of these sorts of men before his conversion.
Saint Luke, who knew Paul well, describes the specifics of Paul’s conversion in the Acts of the Apostles:
Now Saul, still breathing murderous threats against the disciples of the Lord, went to the high priest and asked him for letters to the synagogues in Damascus, that if he should find any men or women who belonged to the way, he might bring them back to Jerusalem in chains. On his journey, as he was nearing Damascus, a light from the sky suddenly flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to him, “Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting Me?” He said, “Who are You, Sir?” The reply came, “I am Jesus, Whom you are persecuting. Now get up and go into the city, and you will be told what you must do.” The men who were traveling with him stood speechless, for they heard the voice but could see no one. Saul got up from the ground, but when he opened his eyes, he could see nothing; so they led him by the hand and brought him to Damascus. (Acts 9:1-8)
Many people imagine Paul’s conversion based on artists’ portrayals. Over the centuries, artists like Peter Paul Rubens and Caravaggio depicted Paul, or Saul as he was then known, falling from a horse when he heard God calling his name. It’s a poetic touch intended to show the drama of the moment, but the biblical record doesn’t support it.
In the Acts of the Apostles, what is recorded as happening is that a “light from the sky suddenly flashed around him. He fell to the ground and heard a voice saying to him, ‘Saul, Saul, why are you persecuting me?'” (Acts 9:3-4)
An accurate depiction of this great event in Paul’s life might well simply be a painting of him writhing on the ground, blinded and trying to make out what was happening to him, similar to Domenico Morelli’s “The Conversion of Saint Paul” (1876).
Paul’s feast day is unique because it’s the feast of his conversion. On Jan. 25, the Church celebrates how a good but stubborn man was changed. It celebrates how Our Lord Himself temporarily blinded Paul so that he would eventually come to see the true light that is Christ!
In the New Testament, Paul’s great letters, written after his conversion, actually give witness to the saint’s deep transformation of faith. Paul’s conversion was the start of his relationship with Our Lord. What Paul’s letters testify to is that Paul was a good learner over the course of his lifetime and took to heart what he came to see about a savior God Whom he had persecuted.
When reflecting on their relationship with Our Lord and discerning what God wants of them, many disciples may easily get discouraged if they don’t experience a sudden transformation or a dramatic sign from God. During many spiritual direction sessions, I’ve reminded directees that “Rome wasn’t built in a day.”
Despite Saul’s encounter with Jesus on his journey to Damascus, many years transpired before he was trusted by the Christian communities and before he began sending the world’s most important letters to key Christian communities of the time. Eleven years passed between the time he heard God’s call on the road to Damascus and when he set out on his first apostolic journey with St. Barnabas, his faithful travel partner.
The name Barnabas means “son of encouragement,” and he was known to encourage Paul to preach to suspicious Christian communities who were well aware of Paul’s history of persecution.
From more than one perspective, Paul’s life journey teaches us to avoid discouragement and stay the course. It teaches us to give ourselves some time to grow in the Holy Spirit. This lesson is even more poignant considering Paul’s having been shipwrecked, imprisoned, tortured, beaten and eventually beheaded on the same day his dear friend St. Peter was crucified.
Saint Paul’s conversion reminds us to turn ourselves over to God, to give and receive encouragement and to persist in the Faith of the Apostles. It reminds us to listen to and heed God’s calling our name.